On the news, they're testing a lipstick that supposedly lasts eight hours without wearing off. Being a guy, I was under the assumption that girls applied lipstick only once during the day. I had no clue that lipstick needed to be applied up to four times a day. In the one time I wore lipstick for a play last year, I noticed it slowly wore off of my lips as I drank from my water bottle. In fact I found that watter bottle while cleaning my room, still containing the red lipstick I wore, still marked with a "B" for Beatrice. I even wore the old wig that made me look like Tina Turner for old time's sake. The dress that had a Cinderella look belongs to Anna, so I don't have that. The shoes though, four sizes to small and incredibly painful will be permanently retired. Anyone in need of size 12 heels? And how can you women walk in those things?

I had another thing to add relating to this, but it slipped my mind.

My friend Briant from Morgan is leaving to Tennesee for his mission on July 18. This surprises me because I didn't know he was religious, and I didn't even know he was Mormon. Amazing what you can discover after only seeing someone once in six years despite knowing them for fourteen.

Tom Green is on trial for Polygamy! And to think, he just married Drew Barrymore...wait. You mean it's *not* that Tom Green? Why doesn't the news make this distinction more clear? I doubt our local news teams have even heard of the "Daddy would you like some sausage?" Tom Green.

What else about Utah is screwed? Aside from 3.2% alcohol in beer (comparable to only a tablespoon of sugar in your pitcher of Kool-Aid) some of the people are a little wacko. A local woman wrote this letter about her long-haired tatooed neighbor:

"I don't know your background and the problems you've been through but things are done different here in our community. . . . I wonder where you get off assuming that your girl is always welcome at our house. . . . We are not comfortable with our daughter being in your home with that long haired tattooed thing you've got living in your house. . . . Your neighbors who are in our ward can't believe that you would dare to start up the mower on the Sabbath. . . . They are tired of bottom feeding riffraff renters polluting their neighborhood. . . . Your girls are not welcome in our community on this kind of basis and neither is your kind. Go back where you came from if that's how they let you live back there. . . . You're not welcome here."

Now you see why I complain about this state? Anything considered no big deal across the country is a huge deal in Utah. Plus if you are not part of the majority *cough*LDS*cough* you're seemingly shunned by your community. I can only speak for our family, but we've experienced a lot of prejudice due to the fact that we're not LDS.

I have a new crush, and she's taken sole posession of my pie chart. I saw her yesterday at my sister's school as she was sworn into office as next years' Sophomore class Vice-President. I did my best to play it cool as she looked in my general direction, and stood behind me in the food line during the dinner. I only wish I didn't look like an anorexic when I didn't eat the food. I'm not big on cold sandwiches, plus we were almost late to the inaguration because I was in the middle of eating dinner. By comparison, she looks like a mix between Cameron Diaz and Tia Carrere, who you may remember best from movies such as "High School High," "True Lies," and "Wayne's World."

My cousin Kellee also graduating from high school Memorial Day weekend. We'll jet down to Richfield and jet back that night. I last saw them at my Grandma's funeral nearly two years ago. Ashley, the cousin who is a year older than me helped to cheer me up just before we headed back to Salt Lake. It'll be nice to catch up once again.

Jason

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