January 23, 2002 // 10:55 p.m. // Movies make no sense
I still can't seem to log in on computer A, but at least the internet is working on it again. Mike Tyson is an absolute psycho. We have no chance of beating the Spurs. Eight straight losses. That's two complete years worth or so. I just got done watching a movie on the Disney Channel called, My Date with the President's Daughter. There is no way that all of the stuff that happened in that movie could happen in one night. Because of my visits to The Weather Channel, I know the only way she'd feel comfortable in the dress she was wearing would likely be summer. Because it gets dark later in the summer, I put the start time at 9:00 p.m. It's like piecing together the events in Ferris Bueller's Day Off and figuring if they could actually happen chronologically and in the time frame. Let me tell you why President's Daughter doesn't work aside from every movie of it's type involving exaggerated and overly uptight secret service agents, a discipline kid who does anything to escape them and who always has an accomplice. The kid will always think his life is lame, and would do anything to change it. The president is always busy, the secret service always loses the kid, and in the end, the First Family always discusses what went wrong, and live happily ever after. So now, what goes wrong with the movie. I forgot what time he picks her up or what time she gets home, but it's safe to say in a six-eight hour period, the following happens: Pick up the President's daughter on a date. Go to a movie, where it takes you a good portion of the movie to lose the agents. Take her shopping and wait while she tries on approx. 12 different outfits. Drive to a dance club, stay long enough to dance a few dances, get chased by hillbillies you upset earlier, stop by a biker bar, avoid getting beat up by the biker's by performing quite a few magic tricks... (Jason pauses to catch breath) ...get your car stolen, walk around the city and while being chased, climb to the top of a building, dance, take the bus to a political rally your father is holding, stay long enough to get on T.V. and to get recognized, get in a fight with your date, watch as your date leaves with a guy she danced with at the club mentioned earlier, drive around on a moped and look up his address but visit four other addresses before you find his... (Jason pauses again to catch his breath) Visit Washington Monument, and Lincoln Memorial and finally walk back to the White House all without being recognized as the President's daughter. As a sidenote, the President also gets thrown in jail. And why I spent all this time telling you this, I don't know. Jason Last time on Apexsensatin : Now on Apex : Apex Archives : Next time on ApexsensatinDamnit, I told you! There's no time for bullets!