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April 25, 2004 // 11:53 p.m. // 40% chance I'd be discovered becomes 100%
If I had one of those mood indicator icons, it'd say, "embarrassed." My "secret crush" from the last entry earlier this morning has been unraveled, and it only took...about eighteen hours. Who would have guessed that someone who was at this small little fairly obscure show at a new obscure venue would a) visit their site, b) find the link to concertomine that is on their site, c) (presumably) see a link to my journal while on concertomine and d) actually click on my journal and read it and e) realize I was talking about *that* specific show. A friend once told me that I, "don't do the vague thing well" and another pieced together an entry I wrote about her as well. Of course, being stubborn, I said, "nah, you guys are crazy. I can pull it off." But I realize now that I really *don't* do the vague thing well, and it took this to make me realize it. I'm sure the person I wrote about in an entry earlier this month knows it's about her too. So how does this change the crush? Simple. It doesn't. It just makes things a bit weird in my own head, because I didn't expect anyone to know. Like I said in that entry, my definition of crush, in its simplest terms, is someone I find attractive and/or very talented at something they do. That's all this one is. It isn't one of those that you've read about in the past where I fawn all over the person. That's so 2002. It's an attraction, a bit of an admiration over her talent, and probably won't go beyond that. Though I have to admit, I'm embarrassed that my secret crush is no longer secret. But it's all my fault for thinking I could be vague. Though you have to admit, had it not been for the seemingly neverending freak chain of events that led to me being discovered, I had my back covered. Though I suppose describing the only female to play that night by what she was wearing wasn't the smartest idea.